My wife and I had a breakthrough yesterday. We are both tired of the same old thing, day in and day out. Well, actually, she said it. I’ve said it before and she got her feelings hurt by it, but when she says it….
In all honesty, I’m glad she admitted what I’ve known for a long time: she is bored and looking for something out of the ordinary in life.
You see, when you have autistic children, you have to build and wall-a cocoon, if you will-to guard their fragile state of mind. Routine gives them stability. But to any autism parent, it gives us nothing but Insanity!
It’s like watching Groundhog Day on a fucking loop!
Variety is the spice of life, is it not? In my life, there is no variety. Yesterday, I met a man in the liquor aisle of the grocery store. And we got to talking about the various brands of beers. He said that he was going to a draft party for NFL Fantasy. You know, I envied him just a little bit.
I don’t have many friends; certainly not ones that have invited me into a football fantasy league. If either my wife or myself take time for ourselves, we are like King David when he pleaded with God to stop striking him.
Now, I know that swinging or going to a nudist colony is a placebo for what ails you. But we are stuck in a rut with seemingly no way out! It’s hard to live a life when you have no hope for a brighter future.
My wife is wanting to move to another state next year come tax time. I am less optimistic about it. Either it won’t happen due to lack of funds, or we will and it’ll just be the same old guarded life; keeping people at a distance because we don’t want or need their judgment.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but when it comes to swinging, it requires a certain level of commitment, communication and trust for it to work. I’m not sure we can qualify for two out of the three. Or any of them. Besides that, again, correct me if I’m wrong, but swinging is a sport best left to the middle and upper classes.
We’re lower class. Dirt in the eyes of some.
I can’t think of anything else to write or a good departure line, so I’m going to stop here…