Dr. Hook: Sylvia’s Mother

I woke up the other morning with this song stuck in my head, and it’s been there ever since. It’s about time someone else had it stuck, too!



The title of this post could have a double-meaning. One, I don’t see the importance of sex in a relationship-or, is that just the one I’m in?

Two, I think everyone has a little anti-opposite-sex in them. I’m thinking it’s the second one.

One of the things I can’t figure out is leaving the toilet seat down for women. Don’t they have two hands? Granted, I leave the toilet seat and the lid down because I don’t want piss and shit spraying up on me!

I know what you’re going to say: it’s the chivalrous thing to do!

Well, chivalry is dead! The way men are portrayed in the media and commercials as bumbling idiots, and how you can’t say hello to a woman without her getting offended…

Anyway, I’m getting carried away here! Here are some hand written signs I found on the good old Internet. I hope you find them as humorous as I do.

Graveyard Night

Dog on Death Row

Much to our detriment, men internalize things. When we are bothered by something, we hold it in and ruminate on it. We may even distance ourselves from those around us.

Why do we do this? Two reasons:

First, we are not wired that way. From early childhood, we are taught to suck it up! It don’t hurt that bad! Big boys don’t cry!

And second, our women won’t listen to us anyway. They cherry pick our words and phrases and decipher hidden messages that were never present to begin with. Then our emotions are turned around and used against us.

I’m a worrier. I can’t help it! If there is something worth worrying about, I’ll find it! I’ll pursue that mother fucker until I run right passed it, then I’ll turn around and pursue it some more!

This morning, I was sitting at the kitchen table, drinking my coffee and wondering how am I going to pay my bills? We went through our tax money like water. I bought an Xbox and a couple of games. But whenever my wife went to the store, it was a hundred dollars here, a couple hundred there.

I tried telling her to slow down on her spending, we have other things to pay for. Did she listen to me? Hell no!

Now I have a car just sitting because I don’t have $600 to fix it. And now I’m cursed with the burden of trying to figure out how do I fix it? How do I make my ends meet seemingly out of thin air?

I could sell myself for sex, but that wouldn’t get me much, would it?

She told me I look like a dog on death row. And I guess that’s how I feel. I feel like a failure, a fraud. A boy who thought he could take on manhood, but lost. I have no dreams, no ambitions.

And like a dog, laying on the floor of his kennel, I’m just waiting for when it’s my turn to walk that last mile.

Graveyard Night

Don’t know what to write…

I’m sitting here drinking a cup of coffee, two out of three of my boys are off to school, the dog is barking out back, and it’s cold outside. I hate the cold. I’m so tired of gray and gloomy days. Warm one day, cold the next.

Gets on my fucking nerves.

I got my blogs back, but lost everything. I guess that what you get for being an idiot. Evidently, not everyone finds sex Gifs as appealing as I do. Be that as it may, it isn’t a mistake I am likely to repeat.

It’s amazing how a man can check out emotionally and be a hollow shell strutting about this world and still be fully functional. That’s how I look at it anyway.

Y’all have a good day!